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Jun
20

The Four Walls That Trap Us

I believe in the power of positive thinking, but I have got to tell you I am starting to get a little depressed.

I honestly thought our house would be sold by now, that by summer we would be gallivanting through China.  But here we are still, trapped by these four walls.

Our Kitchen

We can’t leave on our adventure until our house sells and our market is really slow.  To make matters worse, we thought we were doing the right thing when we made our house as environmentally friendly as we could afford to but after putting all that extra money into making an amazing home we may have priced ourselves out of the market.  It turns out that people coming to this small town may not see or understand the extra value of a lower impact house.

At the beginning of the year I was full of positivity.  I drew my vision board with a big sold sign in the middle.  I didn’t even consider the prospect of the house not selling.  And now negativity is creeping in.  I am starting to resent the house.  The thought of having to spend another winter in it makes me mope.  I am finding it hard to keep up my positive energy.  I feel stuck, I feel trapped.

And while intellectually I realize that everything is happening for a reason and that the worse case scenario is we have to spend more time than we expected living in a beautiful house, I can’t seem to shake the funk.  I realize that my thoughts are petty and that in the grand scheme of things our family is incredibly lucky.  And I am doing my best to find joy and appreciate every moment but I keep circling back to anxiety.

So, please send some positive energy my way, I could use a pick me up!

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24 comments

  1. Jenn Miller says:

    Oh Amy… I’m sorry you’re in a funk and that your house is feeling trappish at the moment!! Can you rent it? Surely you’ve already thought of that, but I figured I’d mention it.

    I just know that we’re going to cross paths in Asia in the coming year, sit on the terrace of some cool little place, sip a drink and watch our kids play together. You already ARE a nomad family, it’s a heart matter, not a location matter!!

    You’re using this time to build your blog, increase your contacts, grow your dream… all good and useful things!

    I’m sending you a big hug and all the encouragement in the world today!! See you in Asia!

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      Thank you Jenn, this is exactly what I needed to hear. You made me tear up. I pictured what you wrote, our families hanging out watching our children play together and felt happiness. This is what I am working towards.

      And you are right, this is a great time to build the blog and increase my community. Something I won’t be spending as much time on when we are traveling.

      Renting the house is not an option for us as the rent would only service our debt payment. All of our money is in the equity of the house so we do need to liquidate before we can travel.

      We WILL see you in Asia! Hugs!

  2. justinmussler says:

    Years ago I bought a home to flip and the market crashed a month later. I have now been in this home for 6 years. It sucks. But, let’s say that house had flipped in a month and I had made big cash. Sure enough I would have rolled that money over into another home and tried it again. Had I flipped our house as planned I would be in construction and real estate now instead of travel and writing.

    You don’t need to understand the reasons why things are happening. Just understand that they are happening for a reason and stay focused on your goal. It’s all good. SE Asia is coming!

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      Thank you Justin, you are right. I just need to stay focused and know that life is unfolding exactly as it is meant to.

  3. Tania says:

    Lovely Amy,
    Don’t despair, it will happen. When? Well that is for destiny to say but know that everything happen for a reason. Your house will be sold because we have to meet during our trip.
    You might need to meet someone, or be present for a special occasion that you are not aware of yet.
    Our house has had the magic “sold” sign on for more than 4 months now and we have not yet signed our contract, which in England, legally bind the buyer to purchase the house. We are going through a long process with the solicitors and I do hope that it will be sorted very soon. But this stops us to buy our tickets, and the rest of the packing that we need. I cannot jump for joy yet and I know how frustrating you must feel, you have the sentiment that it will never go through but it will. The light will be at the end of the tunnel. You are organised and ready and the right buyers will come. They will realise that your house is worth all the extra cash you have put into. It is a beautiful place to raise a family.
    I wish you all the luck you need and don’t forget to keep smiling.
    You might want to have a quick look at our very fresh newly created blog.
    http://5onajourney.wordpress.com/
    Love, light and peace
    Tania.

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      Thank you Tania. I do know it is all for a reason, maybe we were meant to meet someone or come up with a new idea, maybe its better if we concentrate on paying off more debt so that we can travel longer when the time comes, we are where we are because we are supposed to be here. Intellectually I know this, but I just want to go so bad!

      Thank you for your kind words and I wish you all the best in selling your own house. I will be following along on your adventures!

  4. Shelly says:

    Oh cous’. Be thankful you have a home – things could be worse 😉 Pack up the family and come visit soon. Kids will be out of school in less than 2 weeks and we hope to wind that up by camping 🙂

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      I am thankful, I know I am blessed. I am just having a hard time being patient when there is so much riding on the sale of the house. I hope we can come visit this summer, I would love to go exploring with you!

  5. Amy @livinontheroad says:

    Interesting that you write this now. We rented our house out 18 months ago. The rent covered the mortgage payments then, but now interest rates have gone up we are out of pocket each month by $$$.

    We are tossng up whether we continue to hang on to the house or sell it now.

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      That is a tricky situation. The real estate market is always a gamble with pros and cons to renting and selling. I guess it all depends on your comfort level with interest rates and market value.

  6. Rebeca says:

    Happy thoughts coming your way!
    I’m sorry, though… that is a hard place to be.
    We are hoping to be able to sell our home in the next year too, although it’s not yet ready to put on the market. I wonder what will happen when we do, as it’s pretty bad where we are as well. We have location going for us, but other than that people could buy a much newer home on a smaller lot for the same price.

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      Thanks Rebeca, it seems so trivial but it is a hard place to be when we have so much riding on the sale of the house. It is really hard not to get discouraged. I hope your house sells fast and thank for the positive thoughts!

  7. At Home in the World says:

    Hi Amy,
    I’m sending you some love and positive thoughts. I felt exactly the same way as you did when we were waiting to sell our house. We had so many showings and were so disappointed that no one made an offer. I remember feeling really down too and was starting to think that I would have to prepare for another year in the house, as the selling season would soon be over. Then, miracle of miracles, a week later a family viewed our home and we had a contract signed within a week. The exciting time for you is coming, SE Asia is right around the corner for you. I can feel it! Wishing you all the best!
    Jenn

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      Selling homes is so stressful isn’t it? I am glad to hear that you went through these feelings too. Hopefully our situation turns out as yours did and a sale is just around the corner!

  8. Aina says:

    I seem to remember a lovely lady, who in her other two houses, felt the same way yo do now. Do you remember her? She thought the day would never come when the houses would be sold, and as you may remember, there came a day when the waiting was over, and the dance of joy began! So, think positive, but do not spend time wastefully with melancholy, but enjoy every day with your lovely family, and good healthl! You are so fortunate to have a net work of family and friends who love you!

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      I guess this feels different for me. For the other properties, yes I worried and stressed that they didn’t sell but the next step was to just build another house. For this one we are changing our lifestyle when it sells and traveling the world as a family. I feel there is so much riding on the sale. But yes, I am fortunate. I have wonderful family and great friends who love us, we live in a beautiful area and have a comfortable life.

  9. Vesna says:

    oh WOW I have so been there (twice even!). The first time I nearly drove my self insane with massive panic attacks (as we had purchased a house whilst the first one hadn’t sold yet…can you say stupid?). The second time, was when we were about to hit the road and become nomads. We finally decided, that sale or no sale, we’re going. Doesn’t matter where we were going – even just road tripping it near by and having someone else show the house. Whatever it took. We scaled down from a trailer to a tent trailer that we could afford even if the house wouldn’t sell. As SOON as we had decided we’re going regardless of the sale, we got an offer on the house….like LITERALLY the same day. It was mind boggling. But we didn’t just say we were going. We seriously put the plan in action and decided screw this, we are NOT being slaves to this freaking house just because the market sucks and it’s not selling. In the end, we had to pay $46 000 as a bank penalty to get out of the mortgage and got $20 000 less than asking price. OUCH. BUT we were FREE…we are free!!! And you will be too. I know it’s hard to see. All I can say is MAKE A PLAN – regardless of the home sale….make it work somehow. Leave for the summer….go camp somewhere close…anything…..just leave. Put your energy to getting a new plan in place…scale it down as much as you have to, but get out. It WILL work out.

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      Wowzers, how is that for telling the universe your plan and having it conspire to support you! That is an amazing story. I have actually been thinking about ways out but right now I don’t see any open doors. Mike has to work to pay our debt load and we will have the debt load until we sell the house……But you have given me food for thought for sure. Maybe there is a way and I just haven’t seen it yet. I am going to keep my eyes OPEN! Thank you so much for sharing your story!

      1. Vesna says:

        Yeah, it was funny because we went straight back to the RV retailer and looked at tent trailers for the first time and decided on one and put the money down. No word of a lie, on the ride home, I laughed and said to Mike ‘It’d be pretty funny if we got an offer today’. By that I meant that (if we got asking price), we could go back and buy the bigger trailer as originally planned. Not kidding you within *minutes* the cell rang. That ended up being the buyer. Weirdest thing that ever happened. We too were/are carrying debt, but we also work on the road, so obviously a different scenario there. We have been able to pay off massive amounts during these past 6 months though due to very little expenses. Again – I’m not familiar with your whole situation, but really get inventive and thing about it from every possible direction….I bet there’s at least one suitable, compramis-able solution. 🙂 Best of luck!!

        1. worldschooladventures says:

          So amazing. I have been thinking about it all morning and I am going to do some brainstorming when I have a quiet moment. I am going to open myself up to possibilities and see what comes of it.

  10. Vesna says:

    Nice! 🙂 Let me know how it turns out! Vibes to you 🙂

  11. Nadine Hudson says:

    Dear Amy
    I can understand you so well. We never normally have big posessions (we always rent a place and therefore can leave it with short notice) and having a camper is the first time for us to have something so “big” and even though I believe that we will be able to sell it and all will be well in the end, I also sometimes feel the same as you. You know it will all be fine, but you just want this to happen now. I am terribly impatient. You have been waiting a long time now and I can understand that you are getting frustrated. However, like all the others said as well, it will be good for something and looking back one day you will understand why this took so much time and appreciate it.
    We all keep our fingers crossed. In Switzerland we have a saying that every pot finds a lid. Your house will find the right buyer.
    All the best
    Nadine

    1. worldschooladventures says:

      Thank you Nadine. I do know it is going to happen but it is like you said, I am impatient. This trip has been such a long time in planning and now that we are ready for it, the waiting is agonizing. All I can do is keep on hoping and dreaming for now!

  12. sattvicfamily says:

    I know exactly how you feel Amy…I remember when I was back in LA, I was dying to get out. It took us forever, or it felt that way. I also had pp depression, which didn’t help. The travel bug was really pushing me.
    It will happen soon!!!!

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